15 Sweaters

Sweaters are very important out here, at least they are for me. Sweaters serve two purposes. The first one is obvious: keeping me warm. That can be a challenge depending on the weather. But the second is maybe even more important: sweaters make me bigger. When you're a small person, especially if you're a small female person, others tend to push you around, or get too close in your personal space. Sweaters make me seem bigger than I am, even to me. Maybe not exactly scary, but big, which makes people think twice.

My favorite sweater is a dark blue cable knit with an anchor. I usually wear it on top of the yellow turtleneck and the orange cardigan that I found by the swings in the park. I know that orange one belongs to some kid, so I always wear it under the bigger sweaters. That way no one will see it and maybe recognize it. Would I get arrested if that kid's mother saw the orange sweater on me? I never thought of that. Anyway, it's not usually visible.

I have this half sweater that has very short arms and a rhinestone button. It's not warm at all, but it is powderpuff pink which makes me feel girlish. I don't know why that's something I'd want to feel, but there you go. Sweaters are not always logical. Tanya gave it to me, I think. She might want it back, but too bad.

In cold weather I usually wear some sweatshirts too, and the green Duffy's Pub shirt which is quite thick. I'm not sure if sweatshirts count as sweaters, but I guess so. I don't like them as much. I trade sweatshirts a lot, but I usually hang on to my sweaters, even that rainbow sweater that Marianne talked me into trading for the doll she was so in love with. That was a bad trade. The rainbow sweater makes me sneeze because of the yarn, but now I'm stuck. Maybe some day I'll find a sucker to trade for it.

I found the gray sweater coat in a Goodwill donation bag over by the mall. Jack says it makes me look like a Raiders fullback, which is just what I had in mind. I sort of stole it because the Goodwill truck was closed for the day, and that bag of clothes was going to get all damp, and maybe the sweater would be stolen by someone who didn't need it as much as I did. I would never have enough money to buy it at the Goodwill. When I get into my Needy Person head, I can rationalize lots of behavior that I know is not right.

The only time I ever got in trouble for stealing was about a Hershey's chocolate bar, when I was 9. But that was different. Then I had money, or my parents did, and I could have got that candy bar by legal means. Now I don't have money or parents. What's it called Goodwill for if they don't hand out some? During warmer weather like now, I keep the sweater coat in the bottom of my cart. But if I get stuck at night, it makes a good blanket. Hey! There's a third reason why sweaters are important: as sleeping blankets.

I wonder how many sweaters I have? Better count them.

I've been thinking about that red windbreaker again, the one that Tony got. A windbreaker would work quite well in this warm time of year, plus it would make me look huge when it puffs up with air.

But no. That red is just way too bright.